Perfect Strangers Online - Episode Guide - Episode 18: Dog Gone Blues

Perfect Strangers Episode Guide

EPISODE 18 - Dog Gone Blues

First Air Date: January 7, 1987
Nielsen Rating: 17.9 HH

Co-Producer: James O’Keefe
Created by: Dale McRaven
Written by: John B. Collins
Directed by: Joel Zwick

Cast:
Bronson Pinchot: Balki Bartokomous
Mark Linn-Baker: Larry Appleton
Ernie Sabella: Mr. Donald Twinkacetti

Guest Cast:
Tina Lifford: Mrs. Cooper
Ebonie Smith: Cooper girl
Ben Hoag: Cooper boy
Friday: Suprides

Dimitri Appearances: Dimitri is located on the table and see to the left of Larry’s head in the beginning of the episode. For the rest of the episode Dimitri can be seen on the table dressed as a dogcatcher with a little yellow hat.

Balki-isms:
" . . . . we teach him save children from the burning building just like Lousy!"
"My little puppy dog Couscous was smart as two whips!"
"Oh, Bullwinkle!"
"Now that’s the spirit of ‘76!"
"In a month, it will be third nature!"
"Why beat a dead dog?"
"Search to your heart’s contempt!"

Don’t be ridiculous: Said twice in this episode.

Other catchphrases used in this episode:
Balki’s "Huh?"
"Balki, Balki, Balki . . . "
"Get out of the city!"
"Well, you got that right . . . "
"Oh po po . . . "
"Hi!" in stereo

Other running jokes used in this episode:
Balki laughs at his own joke
The Dance of Joy, first done by Balki alone and then by Suprides
Balki and Larry sigh at the same time (done twice)
Balki cries to get something he wants

Interesting facts:
- The title of the episode is a play on words based on the expression "doggone blues."
- Suprides was played by a dog actor named Friday.
- Couscous was Balki’s childhood dog on Mypos. Couscous is actually a Mediterranean pasta dish made from semolina that originated in the Maghreb and is very popular among many different cultures.
- This episode marks one of the few times we actually see the hallway outside the guys' apartment.
- Actress Ebonie Smith, who played the young Cooper girl in this episode, would go on to play Penny Peyser in some episodes of Perfect Strangers' spinoff show, Family Matters, where she played Laura's best friend during the first season.

Bloopers and Inconsistencies:
- A very cute semi-blooper was left in this episode when Balki asks Surprides if he thinks they can pull off fooling Mr. Twinkacetti. The dog looks offstage, waiting for a cue from his trainer. In that moment of hesitation Bronson improvises the line "He’s thinking it over" until the dog barks and they can continue.

Synopsis:
The episode begins with an establishing shot of the apartment. We hear Balki's voice saying, "All right, Cousin. Cover your eyes. I have a surprise for you!" Inside the apartment, we see Larry standing near the front door and covering his eyes as Balki leads him to the couch. "You know I don't like surprises unless I know what they are," Larry complains, "Now what is it?" "Oh Cousin, if I tell you it . . . it won't be a surprise," Balki points out. "Oh, Balki!" Larry whines. "Okay, I give you a hint," Balki says, as they sit down together, "Uh, it's bright green, it . . . it . . . it hangs from a tree . . . and it's twenty-four feet long." Balki laughs at his own joke and then gets up to get the surprise as Larry sits on the couch, his eyes still covered, and thinks about it. "Bright green . . . hangs from a tree . . . and it's twenty-four feet long," Larry repeats. Balki opens the bathroom door and a dog runs out and jumps onto the couch, surprising Larry. "Oh!" Larry says, and he starts to laugh happily.

"It’s a dog!" Balki announces needlessly. "Well, it certainly is," Larry agrees, petting the dog. "My hints threw you off, huh?" Balki asks. "Yes, way off," Larry nods. "Isn't he great?" Balki asks. "Yes," Larry smiles. "His name is Suprides," Balki explains. "Suprides?" Larry repeats. "Very good," Balki praises Larry's pronunciation. "Well, that's a very pretty name," Larry says, "What does it mean?" "It means dog," Balki says flatly. "It means dog?" Larry asks. "Well, of course it does. Don't be ridiculous," Balki says, "What did you think I’d call him? Table?" Balki laughs at his own joke. "Well, he's a very cute dog," Larry smiles, "Who does he belong to?" "Cousin, that’s the great part!" Balki explains, "He belong to us! Now I am so happy, I do the Dance of Joy!" Balki does the Dance of Joy by himself into the kitchen as Larry, looking concerned, gets up and follows him. "Yeah, uh, Balki? Did I miss something? When I left this morning I didn't own half a dog." "Well, you're a richer man today," Balki notes, taking two frozen dinners from the freezer and carrying them to the kitchen table.

"You're gonna love this," Balki begins, "The other day I am on my lunch hour, taking a walk, and I see this little dog taking a walk. It must have been his lunch hour, too. So, I wanted to have lunch with him." Balki is taking the frozen dinners out of the boxes and asks, "You want the, uh . . . spaghetti or the meat loaf?" "Meat loaf," Larry replies. Balki looks sad and says, "I want the meat loaf." "All right, I'll have the spaghetti," Larry gives in. "'kay," Balki smiles, and he pops the dinners into the oven as he continues his story, "Anyway, em . . . before I could ask him to lunch a man comes up in a prison truck and jumps out and arrests him." "Don't tell me," Larry says, "You followed them to the pound?" "Did I tell you this story?" Balki asks. "No, no you didn't," Larry assures him. "Well, I didn't think so," Balki continues, setting plates and silverware on the table before going back to the couch, "So, em . . . I followed them to the dog prison and, eh . . . they tell me that if nobody comes to claim him that he could be ours. So today I went back and nobody claim him and they give him to me! Isn't that wonderful? And so now he's ours and he comes to live here with us and we . . . we take him to the park . . . "

"Wait," Larry tries to interrupt. "And we teach him to fetch . . . " "Wait, wait," Larry says. " . . . and catch . . . and . . . and we teach him to save children from the burning building just like Lousy!" "Lassie," Larry corrects, "Let's . . . let's go back to that part where he's going to live here with us. He's a very nice dog but, Balki, I don't see how we can keep him." Suprides lowers his head and looks sad. "Oh . . . don't . . . don't talk like that in front of him," Balki says, "You hurt his little feelings." "Uh, excuse us, Suprides," Larry says, and he takes Balki by the arm and leads him up from the couch and takes him aside. "Balki . . . " Balki orders Suprides to stay in Myposian. "Balki . . . Balki, Balki, Balki," Larry sighs, "Have you given any thought at all to what's involved in having a dog?" "Well, of course I have. Don't be ridiculous," Balki scoffs. "Balki, we don't even know if he's housebroken," Larry points out. "Ah!" Balki scoffs, "I can train him. I'm good at that. I'm a sheepherder. Of course, you can’t train a sheep, they’re dumb as a rock."

"We're both ignoring the biggest problem," Larry continues, "We can't keep Suprides because our lease forbids us to have pets." "Get out of the city!" Balki cries. "Yes," Larry nods. "How could anyone not allow animals?" Balki asks. "Balki, Twinkacetti evicted the last tenants for having pets," Larry explains, "Do you want that to happen to us?" "No, but . . . Cousin . . . don't make me take him back," Balki pleads, "I had, when I was a little boy, I have a dog on Mypos called Couscous and he grows up with me and he tends sheep with me and before you he was my best friend!" Balki walks back to the couch to sit with Suprides. "And when I came to America, I have to leave him behind. And . . . and now I have a dog again." "Well, Balki, I know how you feel," Larry assures him, taking a seat on the end table, "I had a dog back in Madison. Spot. I named him myself. Yeah, he showed up on our front door one winter, half frozen, the poor little fella. We thawed him out and nursed him back to health. I taught him to bring me the paper. Spot was smart as a whip."

"Well, my little puppy dog Couscous was smart as two whips," Balki brags, moving to sit on the arm of the couch next to the table where Larry is sitting, "In the morning he used to bring me my sandals." "When Spot fetched the paper he used to bring us each the section we wanted," Larry counters. "When we wanted news, Couscous used to drag home the village gossip," Balki tops Larry. "Spot could read the paper," Larry boasts. "Couscous could play the mandolin!" Balki counters. "Spot did my taxes," Larry brags. Balki scoffs at this, crying, "Oh, Bullwinkle!" "All right, all right, he didn't do my taxes," Larry admits, "but he was one of the all-time great dogs." "Oh Cousin," Balki says sympathetically. "I miss him," Larry sighs. "Cousin, wouldn't it be great to have a dog again?" Balki asks, walking over to kneel next to Suprides. Larry looks down at Suprides as he gets up and walks across the couch to Larry, placing his head on Larry's knee.

Larry starts to pet him, saying, "Yes, you like that don't you?" Balki watches hopefully. "Yes, you do. Yes . . . yes, yes. No . . . no, no, no," Larry gets serious again, "The bottom line is our lease forbids it. We'll have to take him back." "But Cousin, the man at the dog prison says that the dogs that nobody wants are . . . " Balki covers Suprides ears with his hands and then whispers, " . . . put to sleep. And . . . and if . . . if we take him back this dog is a dead duck." "Well," Larry thinks, "maybe we could work it out. And Twinkacetti's not that hard to fool." "Well, you got that right," Balki agrees, "He hired us!" "All right, if we're gonna break the rules we have to do it right," Larry says, "We'll have to work the dog's schedule around Twinkacetti's, make sure there's no tell-tale doggy signs around the apartment. Yeah . . . yeah . . . I think we could do it. What do you think?" "I think we can do it," Balki agrees, then he asks Suprides, "What do you think?" Suprides hesitates and Balki notes, "He's thinking it over." Suprides barks. "He says he thinks we can do it!" Balki states. Suprides barks again. "What's he say now?" Larry asks. "Ah, well . . . how should I know?" Balki asks, "He’s a dog!"

One week later Larry and Suprides are in the apartment. Larry walks from the kitchen carrying a bowl of potato chips and a soda. "Okay, Suprides. Snack time, buddy," Larry says, sitting on the couch next to Suprides, "Here we go. I got your favorites . . . sour cream and onion. Huh? Like one of these?" Larry picks up a chip and holds it up, coaxing Suprides to speak, "What do you say?" Suprides barks and Larry gives him the chip. "Yes, good," Larry praises, then adds, "Don’t tell Balki I give you these." Balki suddenly bursts through the front door, calling, "Cousin! Mr. Twinkacetti's coming!" "All right," Larry says, jumping up from the couch, "All right!" Balki is jumping up and down nervously by the door. "Don't panic!" Larry urges, then he switches off the TV using the remote and states, "Code red!" They immediately jump into action, following a well-rehearsed drill. Larry picks up a can of spray deodorizer and a bag of dog food from the kitchen table and sprays the room as he crosses to the phone stand, sticking the bag inside.

Balki opens the living room window and throws Suprides' bed out onto the fire escape. Larry sprays the room again as Balki runs past, running right into the spray and collapsing to the floor. Balki recovers and gets up, running to the chair by the fireplace. "Dust sucker!" Larry calls. Balki throws a handheld vacuum to Larry, who proceeds to vacuum the couch to get rid of the dog hairs. Balki picks up Suprides food and water bowls from in front of the fireplace and carries them to the desk. Balki turns to Larry and calls, "Dust sucker!" as Larry throws the vacuum back to him and he closes the desk to hide everything. Larry then runs to the couch and leads Suprides by the collar to the closet, coaxing him with, "Come on. Here we go . . . here we go . . . " Balki holds the closet door open for them as Larry leads Suprides inside. Balki closes the door, looking satisfied. He finally realizes he has closed Larry into the closet as well. "Uh oh," Balki sighs, and he takes hold of the door handle and braces himself before opening the door, releasing an angry Larry.

Before Larry can say anything they hear Mr. Twinkacetti calling out from the hallway, "All right, tenants! Listen up!" We see Mr. Twinkacetti standing next to a light fixture as he calls, "Here's the new light bulb for the hall. Try to make this one last!" He walks away, wiping his face with his tie. Larry and Balki breath heavily at the door, then let out a simultaneous sigh of relief. "I don't know if we can pull this off," Larry says worriedly, "Sooner or later we're gonna get caught." "Cousin, relax," Balki says, opening the closet door and leading Suprides back to the couch, "If we're careful, Mr. Twinkacetti never find Suprides. Come on, Suprides." "Something'll go wrong," Larry sighs, "Something always goes wrong when I break the rules." "We won't get caught," Balki assures him, "You are a great planner. "I am?" Larry asks. "You are," Balki confirms, "Your code red was brilliant." "It was pretty good, wasn't it?" Larry smiles. "Yes," Balki agrees.

"Yeah, well, I'm not worried about us," Larry says, "I mean, we're dealing with a dog here. He could make a mistake." "No, no," Balki argues, "Not Suprides. This is the smartest dog in America. Okay, Suprides . . . let's go show Cousin Larry what you learned in only one week. Come on . . . come on . . . " Balki leads Suprides from the couch to the middle of the open floor and orders him to sit, which Suprides does. Balki reaches into his pocket for a treat, holding it up for Suprides to see. "Okay," Balki says, then motions for Suprides to lie down in Myposian, "Zagda. Now we are so happy, we do the Dance of Joy. Up!" Balki sings the Dance of Joy as he motions for Suprides to stand on his hind paws and spin around in a dance. Once done, Balki gives Suprides the treat. "Oh po po," Balki says happily as he picks up Suprides and sets him on the couch again, "He's a smart dog. You see, there's nothing to worry about. Between the three of us we can pull this off."

"Balki, this whole thing makes me very nervous," Larry complains. "But Cousin, when you're not being nervous, don't you just love Suprides?" Balki asks. Suprides barks. "See?" Balki asks, "He says he loves you, too." "Oh, now you can understand him?" Larry asks. "When he barks clearly!" Balki insists. "Oh ho," Larry scoffs, "Well, he is a wonderful dog. He's worth a little inconvenience." "Now that’s the spirit of ‘76!" Balki smiles. "We'll just do what mankind has done for centuries when faced with a challenge," Larry says, "We’ll adapt. In a week, this will all seem second nature." "In a month, it will be third nature!" Balki adds. "Balki . . . let's take our dog for a walk," Larry suggests. "In the fresh air!" Balki adds. "Proudly!" Larry adds. "With dignity!" says Balki. "Let's go," Larry says, and he reaches over and picks up two ski masks, giving one to Balki. They put them on, hiding their faces. "Now remember," Larry says, "When we get to the corner, you and Suprides get in the dumpster and I'll push you to the park." As they exit the apartment via the fire escape, the scene fades to black.

Act two begins in the apartment at a later time. Suprides waiting beside the front door, holding his leash in his teeth and sitting up on his back paws. Balki and Larry enter, to find him and immediately start petting him. "Yeah, he wants to go for his walk, doesn't he? Yes!" Larry asks. We see Mr. Twinkacetti walking up to their door in the hallway and pounding in it angrily. "All right you deadbeats, open up!" he yells. "The bedroom! The bedroom!" Larry motions, and Balki grabs the leash and leads Suprides into Larry's bedroom. "Uh, Mr. Twinkacetti! What brings you up here?" Larry asks. "You owe me rent!" Mr. Twinkacetti yells, "Open up!" Larry turns to Balki, who has returned to the living room. "He came for the rent! Didn't you pay it?" "No, you pay the rent!" Balki replies. "I gave you the check!" Larry says. "No, you didn't!" Balki insists. "I'm getting ticked off out here!" Mr. Twinkacetti growls. Larry grabs his checkbook and starts scribbling out the check, calling through the door, "Okay, I'm writing the check right now! Just a slight oversight. Now that's two 'Ts' in Twinkacetti, isn't it?"

Suprides barks in the bedroom. Mr. Twinkacetti hears it and tries to open the door, but it's locked. "Okay," Larry says, tearing out the check and opening the door just a crack, "Here we go, yes. Here's the check. I'm sorry I can't ask you in. I'm contagious. I have . . . rickets." Mr. Twinkacetti forces his way into the apartment, scowling, "What you got is a dog in here. I heard it!" Larry laughs, saying, "We don’t have a dog, that’s against our leash . . . lease." Larry notices that the door of the phone stand is slightly open and slyly moves to close it but Twinkacetti catches him and reaches inside, pulling out the hidden bag of dog food. "Then what are you doing with this?" Mr. Twinkacetti asks. "That's mine," Larry says, taking the bag. "Yours? You eat that?" Twinkacetti asks skeptically. "Oh yes, it's very nutritious," Larry covers, opening the bag, "No additives, no preservatives. Chock full of vitamins. Yeah, uh . . . you should eat this well." "Why don’t you have a snack right now?" Mr. Twinkacetti suggests. Cornered, Larry eats the dry dog food, pretending to enjoy it. "Mmm, this is delicious," he feigns, "And if you’re a gravy lover, you just add water!"

Balki comes out of Larry’s bedroom wearing Larry’s robe, which is much too small for him, a makeshift ascot and carrying a book which he pretends to be reading. He overacts being surprised that Twinkacetti is there, faking a sophisticated accent. "Mr. Twinkacetti, you catch me unawares!" Twinkacetti rolls his eyes at this display . . . he’s not buying it for a minute. "Cousin? Guests? Why you didn't tell me?" Balki continues the act. "I was just telling Mr. Twinkacetti about our nutrition program," Larry says, "Balki turned me on to this." Balki looks confused and asks, "What?" Larry shoves a handful of dry dog food into Balki's mouth, explaining, "I’m just explaining to Mr. Twinkacetti why we have dog food in the house but no dog." Balki forces a smile as he eats it. "Would you care to join us for dinner?" Larry asks Mr. Twinkacetti, holding the bag out for him. "It’s nothing fancy," Balki adds. Mr. Twinkacetti walks to the couch and finds a clump of white dog hair, which he holds up, shouting, "Ah ha! Dog hair!" "Dog hair?" Larry asks, then laughs, "Balki, he thinks that's dog hair." Balki laughs as well and they sigh simultaneously at the end.

"We were entertaining a . . . couple of young ladies last night," Larry explains. "They shed," Balki explains, then adds, "Norwegian." Mr. Twinkacetti rolls his eyes and cries, "Oh, puh-lease!" There is a scratching sound from the bedroom and the door moves slightly. "What’s in the bedroom?" Twinkacetti asks. "Nothing," Larry says. "My girlfriend," Balki answers. "Nothing but his girlfriend . . . girlfriend," Larry corrects himself, then adds, "Inga." Twinkacetti makes a dash for the door but Larry and Balki catch him and pull him back into the living room. "Mr. Twinkacetti, you have no right to invade our privacy!" Larry exclaims. "You can't just barge in here and search our apartment!" Balki agrees. "I have every right," Mr. Twinkacetti insists, "I'm the landlord!" As he says this, Larry sees Suprides sneak out of his bedroom and run out the front door. Larry motions to Balki that the coast is clear. "Well, we're the tenants and we have . . . uh, on the other hand . . . why beat a dead dog? Search to your heart's contempt!" Balki offers suddenly. "Be our guest," Larry agrees, also motioning to the bedroom as Balki is doing. Mr. Twinkacetti runs into Larry's bedroom to search.

"Why did you make me eat dog food?" Balki asks. "I had to," Larry says, "Why are you wearing my clothes?" "Don't change the subject!" Balki argues, and he and Larry talk over each other until Mr. Twinkacetti returns and they see him. "Hi," they smile together, trying to act innocent. "Your girlfriend seems to have disappeared," Mr. Twinkacetti notes. "Well, she's very shy," Balki explains, "She probably jumped out the window." "Guys, guys!" Mr. Twinkacetti moans with frustration, "I know you got a dog in here! And when I find it you either get it outta here or you're outta here!" "Seems fair," Larry smiles uncomfortably. Mr. Twinkacetti turns and leaves as Balki offers, "Thank you so much for dropping by." Mr. Twinkacetti slams the door behind him. "How did Suprides get out of the bedroom?" Larry asks Balki. "Well, he opened the door," Balki explains. "But . . . I know that. How did he open the door?" Larry asks. "I taught him how to do it with his teeth," answers Balki. "Well, unless you taught him how to hail a cab I suggest we go get him," Larry sighs. They open their front door to find Mr. Twinkacetti holding Suprides by his collar. "Get rid of Inga," Mr. Twinkacetti warns sternly, and he lets the dog go and walks away.

Some time later, Balki is sitting on the couch with Suprides, looking sad. "Don't worry, Suprides. I don't let Mr. Twinkacetti take you away. I think of something." After a moment, he asks, "You have any ideas?" When Suprides doesn’t answer, Balki sighs, "Me neither." Larry enters the apartment and says, "Balki? How you doin'?" "Cousin, I can't talk right now," Balki says, "I have to think of a way to keep Suprides." "Balki, Mr. Twinkacetti said Suprides had to be out by today," Larry reminds him. "Cousin, we have 'til midnight," Balki points out. "Well, I think I came up with something," Larry says, "I went to an organization that finds homes for animals." "Cousin, I told you I don't want you to do that," Balki notes. "Well, I think I found the right family for Suprides," Larry explains, "You'll like the Coopers." Balki gets up from the couch. "Cousin, how can you think of sending Suprides to a family you don't even know?" "I talked to the Coopers for a long time," Larry assures him, "They took me out to their place. It's a farm with trees and meadows and a brook. And they've got two kids who are just dying for a dog. And they’re right downstairs. Why don’t you just meet them?"

"Oh, I don't want to meet them," Balki sighs, sitting back down next to Suprides. "Balki, I don't think living in an apartment is good for Suprides," Larry points out, "He's cooped up all day . . . he can't get out . . . he can't meet other dogs . . . he can’t date." "But we don’t date and we’re okay," Balki points out. "Balki, forcing a dog to live like us is inhuman. I think he’ll be happier on a farm." "How could he be happy without me?" Balki asks. Larry is very gentle as he sits on the end table and explains, "Balki, I know this is painful for you but I think maybe you're thinking more about what's good for you than what's good for him." Balki thinks about this for a moment, then asks, "They have a farm?" "With sheep," Larry adds. "Sheep?" Balki smiles, "I think Suprides would like sheep," Balki admits. "Can I get the Coopers?" Larry asks. "Yes," Balki nods. Larry walks out the door, leaving Balki and Suprides alone on the couch.

"Did you hear that, Suprides?" Balki asks, "Cousin Larry has found you a new home. And he says you'll like it. And Cousin Larry don't lie. He says it's got a lot of trees and a meadow and a brook and a lot of children to play with and, uh . . . and some sheep to chase just like Couscous does on Mypos." Suprides lays his head on Balki's knee. Balki continues emotionally. "I don’t want you to go . . . but I didn’t rescue you from the prison truck to keep you locked in an apartment all day. And I'll come to see you so you don’t forget me. And maybe some day I have a farm and you can come to visit me and run in my fields and play with me and . . . nobody takes you away from me ever again. So, if you like the Coopers and . . . and you want to go to their farm and wait for me then show me something . . . show me a sign and then I’ll be okay." Balki gives Suprides a hug.

Larry returns with Mrs. Cooper and her two children, a young boy and girl. "Oh, look! What a beautiful dog!" Mrs. Cooper smiles. The kids start to play with Suprides, who takes to them right away. "Balki, this is Mrs. Cooper," Larry introduces. "Hello, Balki," Mrs. Cooper says, shaking his hand. "Hello," Balki smiles. "Can we pet the dog?" the little girl asks Balki. "Of course you can," Balki says. "Here boy," the boy says, hugging Suprides. "Well, Suprides seems to like the kids," Larry notes. "Can we keep him, mom?" the boy asks, "He's the neatest dog in the whole world!" "Can we, please?" the girl begs. Mrs. Cooper looks to Balki for an answer. "Well, Balki, it's up to you," Larry says. "Well, that's up to Suprides," Balki says, fighting back his emotions, "Suprides . . . what do you say?" Suprides barks and does the Dance of Joy. "He says yes, so I say yes," Balki states. "Oh thank you," the little girl says, giving Balki a hug. "You're welcome," Balki replies, reaching over to get Suprides leash to give to them, "Now, you take good care of him. He likes to be scratched right here." Balki shows them where to scratch.

"And uh . . . he likes sour cream and onion potato chips," Balki adds quietly, thinking it's a secret from Larry. "We'll take good care of him," Mrs. Cooper promises, "And you can come visit him any time you want." "Thank you," Balki replies. Balki kneels down and says, "Bye, bye, Suprides," as Suprides licks his face. Balki sits on the couch and buries his face in his hands. "Come on, kids, let's go," Mrs. Cooper says. "Come on, boy," the boy calls Suprides. The kids thank them and they leave. Larry says, "Bye bye," and closes the door, then sits next to Balki on the couch. "I feel bad," Balki sighs. "Well, I'm sorry we had to give up Suprides, too," Larry sighs. "No, I feel bad because I'm a selfish person," Balki explains. "Oh, no you're not," Larry argues, "When you realized what was best for Suprides you did it. And I’m proud of you." "You are?" Balki sniffs. "You bet I am," Larry confirms. "Well, then I feel better," Balki says, "Cousin, someday can we have . . . can we have a little pet?"

"Well, sure, I guess we could get something like a hamster or a fish," Larry says. "I want a fish!" Balki says excitedly. "Well, all right, one of these days we'll go to the pet store . . . " "No, I want to go today," Balki says. "No," Larry says. "I want go today!" Balki insists. "No, we can't go today," Larry says. "I want go today!" Balki cries. "Oh no, Balki!" Larry moans, then gives in, "All right, all right." "Okay," Balki smiles. "We'll go today," Larry agrees, "We'll get one fish. And I get to name it." They get up and start for the door. "But Cousin, just the one fish?" Balki asks, "He's going to get lonely." "Two fish, that’s it," Larry says, "And you clean the bowl." Balki grabs his jacket from the chair and asks, "Can we get the little diver with the bubbles?" "No, we can't get the little diver with the bubbles," Larry argues. "Can we get that sticky stuff that . . . " Balki continues to ask as they walk out the door.

Continue on to the next episode . . .